fatherless

you said you loved me
you said you loved us both.
you said that you loved this family.
i clung onto that with all i my heart.
denying all the facts that proved otherwise.

i cant believe that changed.
you dont love this family anymore.

the thoughtless careless things you said about me.
and what you said to my face.
when i took the time to see you after you left me behind.
the way you put me down.
like i was not your daughter.
like i was no one.

im amazed at my tolerance and capacity sometimes.
things happen. and i think i cant handle it anymore.
so i break down and cry my heart out . and somehow
im still here.
the things youve said burns through me
like a hot fork pressed into my chest.
it disintegrates who i am.
and the scar will always remain.