alecko.
alex.
al.

you by far were always the cousin that i always worried for
wish i could be there the most for
and wanted to watch out the most for..

ive always tried to tell you.
always tried to warn you.

youre so stubborn
youre too strong
too reckless
you wanted to take the world.


in a hospital
with bruises and fractures.
not the way to go.

worried about you alecko.
take care.
may God watch over you.

unforgivingheart (?)

maybe im paranoid
maybe im precautioning
maybe im still scared it might happen again
maybe its cause i still cant let go.. [[it hurt..
maybe its cause i dont like your tone. your enthusiasm. both of yours.

[idontwanttobelieveit.]

trust trust trust.
hard to even say now.

......trust. is how i got into it all along.. if only i didnt trust so much then.
......amnesia. would be wonderful when it comes to this..
yet ...trust. is what i need to get through..

r e s p e c t ♪

gossip i try to avoid and not make a habit of,
which you seem to be fond of and wish to practice
on me. about me. breaks me - piece by piece.
starting from the heart, where i have you.
you mean so much to me. or should.
why you do this. i dont understand.

im sure you love me. you tell me so.
but if you love me, why do you do this to me?
why do you think it helps?
when clearly it doesnt help.
i both shown to you and told you so!

whatever you say or ask, whether reasonable or not.
you expect me to fall to my knees in obedience.
yet you cant seem to respond or even consider a human right
which i persistently ask for you to grant me - respect.
respect for me. my privacy. my life.
yet you have to constantly peer over my shoulder
trying to see what your eyes werent invited to see.
its nothing you need to know. i told you that. and more than once.
why must you still do so?
ps. thanks for trusting me.

why do you judge someone you dont know.
why do you blame things on people in my life. - when you've got no idea.

*reactions arent because of other people other than the situation at hand.


i only as for respect. and respect ill return.

ode to "nvm, w/e"

the feeling in my chest; i just cant explain -
when someone you care for, just causes you pain..
its almost like the more i love thee
the less it takes for you hurt me..
the little things you simply dont want to tell -
i feel. and always will it dwell
in my mind and heart will it remain,
growing with worry and concern; driving me insane.
Feeling like im unworthy to know,
waiting for your reply that seems like ages ago.
perhaps because its in text and i cant tell...
but after reading and reading again, i foretell
thats everything isnt just "fine" but you just wont tell.
what you dont know is that it drives me worried and scared as hell...
i pray that this will stop, habits like this -
because i can not and will not dismiss.
but please, will it dive down to the endless abyss.
as there it will stay as i live here in our sweet kiss.
also where im truely alive am i in your kiss;
praying i dont wake up only finding myself in a reminisce.

through all this, and even a black eye and a war cry.
i can and will never even think of goodbye.

the feeling in my chest; i just cant explain -
when someone you care for, just causes you pain..

sweetpeaa

i never thought there would be someone that cared for me this much
that they would go and sacrifice things in their life that they dont need to.
--just trying to make my day a more specialer one..

birthdays were never a big thing in my life,
never was it really celebrated,
never did anyone really try to do anything for it..

accidentally hearing what youre trying to do so much
seeing you breaking your habits in hopes to get it done
your effort
the heart you put into it
is enough.

and is so afriggindorkable of you sweetpeaa!


thankyous for whatever it is you have in mindd..
and.. goodluck? : S




♥ ilalaloveyoubooo : )