i dont want to do this anymore, hours feel like days
and i find myself looking forward in leaving, looking at the time more and more often..
i dont know whats going on, but its lasting for too long,
feels like its only me feeling that way, only me out of place.
should i go and find some where else? or "stay and fight"?
what am i fighting for? if ive said it before, and nothing has changed,
perhaps they dont want to change, not like people have to respect you.
not like people have to be your friend.
the things i share from the heart, to one i thought really cared,
soon ridiculed the points ive given in public eye.
what im thinking, how i felt, was turned into a joke..
i guess thats how you always thought of it, but why did you lie?
should i stay or should i go. the ties are even.. and i cant decide.
do i loose the memories that i had with people ive known for years? or are they meant to stay behind?
i gave it up to God, but feels as if He's not doing anything with it, and time passes as His will is yet to be made, what do i do in the meantime?
whatever happens, will find its way. whats meant to be, will be. its all in His master plan.
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i just want to let you know that it's not just you. at least 4 of us that i know of feel out of the loop 3.9/4 of the time. but with how cliquey and gossipy our group is, who can't feel like that? there's so many moments where i want to just run away from all of it and leave it all behind.. but the second i stop running, all my problems seem to catch up with me. what i'm saying is: i understand part of what you feel. you're not alone. i feel that way too. and so do others.
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